Monday, October 31, 2011

Memories?!

"The faculty of the mind by which it retains the knowledge of previous thoughts, impressions, or events " - this is what the "www" has to say about Memories... and my thoughts rambled! By virtue of the life that i have lived till now,i beg to differ...i dont buy that explanation.
Memories are not only the crumbled pieces of life that we have lived...its more about the remnants of life - the passion,the desire,the love,the faith,the occurances,nuances and much,much more that you have left behind to live the present.or may be to barge into the future (?!) . Some call it  " The Past",i call it memories - memories of the past...
My understanding is - the brain only perceive those happenings of the past which has an emotional tinge to it,as memories.Memories,therefore,can be good or bad. Good memories are those which still manages to draw a curve in ur face no matter how distant it might be and bad?? well we all know a thing or two about it as well. :D aint it??
After a long time of self-imposed restriction on writing,i once again took to it and that Did bring back the memories.. u might ask "of what"?here's my answer - "lets save this for another day"...
"Hasta la Vista"... ;)

Saturday, March 6, 2010

A Pirouetting Heart!!!

BEEP BEEP!!! the cell grunted...it was already past midnight and he was trying hard to get some sleep,he has to be in office at early morning tomorrow...irked he picked up the phone-it read '1 new message'.the number was unknown.he pressed the read button..time froze..his hands trembled..he read the message over and over again.at times,its really difficult to come in terms with reality...time has its own trick to play-over you,over me and ofcourse neither was he an exception...his sleep swept past him...memories rushed to fill his numb brain..he can see his past vividly...he can still recall the day when he first met 'her'...memories never die...
Six years back,he calculated,yes,six years back he spoke with her for the first time...the conversation was short but the twitch of the conversation was throbbing enough....the next day he called her...she wasnt at home..he called her again...but still she was unavailable...he went back to his study room,which suddenly felt so suffocating,so alien....but then he had to concentrate.he had an assessment the next day...'life is not a movie.One phone call does not change anything...'he made himself understand...he whisked through the pages of his notebook...and then,the phone rang...he smirked!!
'Am getting the call'-he pretended to be composed,but then the mirth in his face glowed!!!he was sure-'it has to be her'-he reaffirmed himself....'Hello!!this is me'-those three words were enough to get his heart pounding..he was waiting for it from such a long time!!!they kept on speaking..it never really mattered if any of them made sense or not...it was one of those days when subject dint matter,but the conversation did...he was happy...so was she-atleast he thought so!!!
'Fuck Man!!why did it rain today!!'-he never had been fond of the tears from the clouds..it made him feel dejected..depressed...rejected.he planned to visit her home today.it turned him off...
'If this is how it has to start,so be it!I AM GOING!'-he murmured!!In an hour he left home to the utter disbelief of his parents,but he was unperturbed...he had to meet her..he had to meet her that very day...rain could not dampen his spirits...he was flying high!!

Thursday, March 4, 2010

Evening Thoughts!!!

Its really bizarre when things get completely out of hand,u get thoroughly screwed and even then u find it terrifically funny...yesterday was one of those days when it happened with me...yet again!!!
well my tryst with these funny bizarre incident has been a 'thing' for a longtime now...having said that let me share an incident with you which occurred long back when i was in school-don't remember the standard though!!!! :P
It was one of those days when our final term result was declared..i barely passed in one of my subjects...was up for another session of tug-of-war with my parents...parents always win this sport!!!doesn't they???so there i was being scolded for another of my lacklustre performance and suddenly my funny bone got tickled,i started laughing haplessly...maybe my parents thought it was a case of severe stress or might be temporary amnesia,but then nothing could hold me back i kept laughing and laughing and finally with a smack(rather a painful one) i was brought back to reality-when parents are scolding you shouldn't laugh..you should pretend to be one of the most docile diligent and repentant person who has committed the gravest of crime by scoring poorly with that poker face of urs...that really works i believe..but here is the catch-it never worked for me!!!might be cuz i was pretty bad at pretension.....but i really didn't care..and neither do i !!!amir khan in 'Dil Chahta Hey' summed it up beautifully for me-'Perfection ko improve karna mushkil hota hey' and if u can manipulate it with the Don(Epic Movie) touch,it appears somewhat like this-'Perfection ko improve karna mushkil hi nehi,namumkin hota hey!!!!'
Wow!!!gotto try my hand in script writing someday with plagiarism being my poison!!!its gotta work.. from RD to Pritam everyone indulges in it...but no one is a specialist; atleast they dont claim to be one... :P now if i somewhat get inspired or motivated by something really special and try to reproduce it,thats not felony...that can be inspired reproduction at the max...nothing more than that!!what say..:D
now getting back to where i started from-y'day it was kind of a grotty day at work...little things getting messed up...small issues leading to big escalations...i dont intend to justify any one of them,but when it has already been done why waste time in speculating the consequences???sit back,relax and watch the fun...but,then gotto make sure that it never gets repeated...thats a felony,yeah for a change and a split second can be serious as well... :)
Moving on,the latest media fodder here has been the sex-scandal of a spiritual leader,who allegedly was caught 'in a compromising position(plagiarism here,i have just copied the narration from Internet)' with an actress...now,the rule of thumb is-'u have to tie your shoes well before u start running'...the guy should have been more careful and alert...but,then why blame him?he is as much human as i am,you are...why does one need to dig into any ones carnal affair when there are other important issues fluttering in the air...
just came across the news that food price inflation rose to 17.87% ...dont you think this news deserve a bit of more attention???after all people still die in this country of mal/under nutrition... we are fighting against the dropping numbers of our national animal..its high time now we fight for ourselves as well...otherwise with all the happenings around it might not be galaxies away when we start being counted as one of the numerous other endangered species as well!!
cheers!!

Monday, March 1, 2010

Of idli,dhosa and sambar...

'Chennai....Tamil Nadu??????Oh Man!!!!Screwed'..this was exactly my reaction when i learnt that am supposed to be at chennai for my job....not that i had a hell lot of idea about this place,but then,there was not even a single soul whose reaction was slightly a bit more encouraging!!!they were more bemused than i was...'i hope u live till the next time i wish to see you mate!!'-one of my fellow friend reacted...it have been over a year for me in chennai..but i still vividly remember those days of apprehension and anticipation...and before i knew it,there i was,at the airport lounge trying hard to strike a conversation for availing a cab for myself...it was really difficult..it was God Damn Difficult...
After 1 year and two months in chennai,when i introspect-i really surprise myself with the honesty of my conscience for this place...this city of idli,dhosa and sambar(as people from northern part of the country would call it) has taught me few most important and valuable lessons of my life...learning things were not easy..now when has learning actually been easy???
This is the place from where it all started- my first job,my first stay away from home,my first grilled chicken,my first salary,my first biking,hiking....so many 'first' things....literally this place has been an alma mater for me..i dare not say i love this place and with the first opportunity that comes my way,i will be off here,but then i will leave this place with a lot of gratitude and respect...it did infuse in me,the belief-i can.and time and again whenever i have been just a bit relaxed,this city have thrown challenges towards me,in different shapes:in different sizes...
today,at the afternoon,on my way i was really pondering over the fact-how lucky i have been!!!there are people-masons as one wud call them,relentlessly at work under the scorching heat of the sun(i presume all of us have heard a thing or two about the heat of chennai),while i was comforting away under my umbrella...well my situation is far better than them.i atleast get to spend most of the time i am awake in the cozy comfort of an air-conditioned cube...how lucky i have been!!having said that,am not trying to be a 'socratis' here,but binging on some normal amount of perspective...now most of us try to take a stock of things what could have happened,but did not happen and sulk or brood(depends on the persons preference) and screw that little bit of happiness that push us to rush forward...but then,this city has taught me to look at the other side of the coin-one of those 'first' things that i was talking about,you know....
my weekday chore has begun..am at office...worried a bit ofcourse about how things would shape up for the daily status report..it can be messy at times,and today it might be that day,am having a feeling...a strong feeling tickled by my 6th,7th and 8th sense!!!over and above,gotto prepare for the session that am going to conduct tomorrow for a couple of teams i.e,nearly 20 people...
so here i go with my music player plugged in my ears,jesus christ!!y dont i get the right things at the right time??? :X
still not getting it...YUP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Finally got it!!!!
Am obsessed with the Lyrics of the song performed by the Legend Himself - Bryan Adams..well he is a legend for me,insurmountable,unsurpassable.....
is there anybody out there?
anyone that's loved in vain
anyone that feels the same
is there anybody waiting?
waiting for a chance to win
give it up and start again
we all need something new
something that is true
and someone else to feel it too
i feel so high - no one else would know it
i don't know why i feel the way i do
i can' t let go - and i'm not scared to show it
cuz being here feels right
tell me - how do ya feel tonight?
is there anybody out there?
anyone that can't explain
anyone that feels no pain
is there anybody dreaming
dreaming of better day
when everything goes your way
we all need something new
something that is true
and someone else to feel it too
someone just like you.....
cheers!!!

Sunday, February 28, 2010

1st march......

its not a bad way of starting the month!!!its a monday and am at home...this doesnt happen quite often...who ever have said that 'change is good'-is actually very correct...this month my week starts from tuesday and ends on saturday...a slight change in schedule at work actually permits me to actuate one of my childhood desires-'knocking it off on mondays'....atleast i wont have that 'case of mondays' symptom...when i start the week afresh on tuesdays,people have already slogged one dreaded day at office..now thats fun...just after a few days,the table will turn..i have to slog from mondays and another lucky guy will be spared from the 'case of mondays'...now thats life for you-for us-for me!!no matter how much you crib,how much you curse you just cant change the inevitable..can you?if that could have been the case i would already have been a very happy person with the girl i love by my side and earning millions of dollars-practically impervious to any of the evils that have ever plagued this place-from AIDS to Recession.
But then,thats not the case...i am a typical slogger with enormous talent(yes,this attitude actually helps as a morale booster) and my girl left me long back!!!planning ahead f0r the day...gotto cook!!yes,i have learnt the art of cooking...i believe my recipes are as unique as it can be with the taste bud acting and reacting depending on the level of experimentation that i have successfully(at times read unsuccessfully) performed...have some pending works to complete and and ofcourse lighting up the smoke few times in between to clear the smoke out of my head..yes-i need some smoke in my lungs to clear the smoke in my head...
and ofcoz,sometimes i will think of her and will end up with another failed attempt of understanding what went wrong...the irony is you can spend all day by thinking and imagining as much as you want,but what you never know if any of them is remotely correct at all!!!
well such is life...isnt it?sachin scored a double ton in the one-dayers...it took him twenty years to achieve it,but he did it...had that been his goal,he wud have quit long back in frustation...
so its not about what we gain today or as a matter of fact what you loose....i dont believe in success,neither am i too much concerned about failures,its the learning part that fascinates me!!most of the time you learn from your mistakes,few times you dont quite understand what is supposed to be learnt,and sometimes we benevolently choose not to learn...these are the choices we make and these choices define how we live the day if not the rest of our lives...
getting confusing???yes..for me it is...gotto clear the smoke in my head..time for a break!!!time for a smoke!!!cheers guys......c u at night!!

Finally i made it!!!

there are not many people who keep things pending in this fast paced and ever increasingly dynamic world...there are not many who presses the hold button of their present and then rewind the past to resolute a thing or two for the future...i resolute,i re-resolute....i contradict,i convince,i confuse,i empathize,i sympathize.....
But precisely,let my first post begin with the enormity of the happiness that i have derived from creating this blog after postponing it for over a year now!!! i really admire the adage - 'Better late than never'...it somewhat gives a cover for my so very much adored and admired and culminated sluggishness.............
Its already 5:02 at the morning...gotto get some sleep....
Just one final thing before i wrap it up- have a great day tomorrow - 'Carpe Diem.....'
Life is too long to be under-estimated,but too short to be over-estimated....
1..2...3...Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz